can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Randomize
