it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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