What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize