Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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