Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Randomize
