wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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