whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize