sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Randomize
