All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Randomize
