the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
