All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
