More tranny stories later!
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
