laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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