Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
