Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
My penis needs a shock collar
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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