we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
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