You're completely useless in the revolution.
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize
