dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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