I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Randomize
