at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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