You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
