god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
