I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Randomize