Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Randomize