we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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