We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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