Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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