We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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