THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
