Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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