I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Randomize
