The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
My legs feel like baby dolphins
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
