with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
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