So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
