ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
this boner is exhausting
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
