i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize