Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
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