Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Randomize
