Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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