doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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