She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize