Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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