I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
