i don't like sucking hair
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
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