I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Randomize
