I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
