thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
