bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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