When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
