Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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