i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
My vagina just clenched in fear
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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