Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
handjob tips. give me some.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Randomize
